Mamash Beloved FRIEND ~ day 36 CHESED sh b’YESOD

Mamash Beloved FRIEND ~ Omer day 36 CHESED sh b’YESOD

Counting Omer 5 full weeks and 1 day of 7 Sephirot weeks

PSALMS OF MY SOUL © Joy Krauthammer

Kabbalistic Sephirat HaOmer  ספירת העומר 
http://sephirathaomer.blogspot.com/2015/03/mamash-beloved-friend-day-36-chesed-sh.html

MY TREE OF LIFE

Understanding Chesed sh b'Yesod* in terms of my relationship at this moment with a friend who I understand is "dying" from cancer.  I want to share my love and give in-person hugs to long-time deeply beloved friend who has been deeply present since college in my life in joy in all personal and family simchas and also has shared in the mamash deepest sorrows since the day we met, the same day my mother, z"l, was hospitalized with cancer for the last six months of her life.  Her sister, z"l, is buried near my husband, z"l.  Her mother, z"l, not far from my mother, z"l.

With this deeply bonded half century relationship, how do I share my love and concern for Friend (and husband and child), giving to her and her family, but not with intention to heal my own broken heart but to somehow help soothe her soul and let her know how loved she is?  Friend is not picking up phone because she is not her mamash deeply joyous self filled with the brightest Light but she is in pain. I send snail, e-mail and loving phone messages that get recorded. In Chesed sh b'Yesod what can I do for my friend? I am honoring her desire for privacy. I refrain from and won't drive over because my Friend has put up boundaries at this time of her life. Friend sounded sooo sick the one time we spoke.

Can you see us dancing at the Skirball evening concerts, and in gardens, riding carousels on the pier for my sister's birthday, walking around the lake meeting strangers, and walking the ocean's sand, playing in the water, and celebrating in museums on both coasts, potting together in the sixties, and riding subways, and being arrested together for trespassing on an island where geese were mating and we ignored police bullhorns from their boats and gave police ridiculous false names? And in shul together. My friend met The Rebbe with me. On my first day of driving in my new used car from the Bronx, I picked Friend up in Queens and we drove to Brooklyn and back home. Friend's daughter and my daughter are 'sisters' just as Friend and I have been.

2016 Misheberach PLEASE ~ Sara bat Freidel.  El Na ReFa Na La
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My heart is again breaking as I read this post from one year ago.
Hours after dear Suzanne, z"l, was put on hospice, she released her body and in Shamayim gave her neshama back to G*D.
Sara Ruchel bat Israel v’Freidel
27 Sivan 5776,  2016
When I needed to talk out issues, it was Suzanne whom I called.
Suzanne was the keeper of my soul, in joy and tears.
The last time that we spoke, Suzanne asked that my daughter look in after her daughter, and my daughter has done exactly that.
Suzanne really was a godmom to my daughter. Our girls are like sisters, older and younger.
Very hard to accept that my friend, my confidant for 48 years is no longer here.
Suzanne laughed and had light surrounding her all the time.
She was a dedicated wife and mother and aunt, sister and friend.
I miss her greatly.
She was always present for me.
When we were teens, meeting in the challenging college years, my home was her home, her sanctuary.
On our last visit together, Suzanne guided my 3.5 year old granddaughter in making/decorating a magic wand.

Creating Magic Wand

My granddaughter chose each rhinestone and Suzanne used the hot glue to make 2 wands.

She was in pain this evening.

© Joy Krauthammer  12.2015

Suzanne

Santa Monica Carousel  2010

celebrating my sister's birthday

© Joy Krauthammer 

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* From Rabbi Simon Jacobson, Meaningful Life Center (permission granted to quote)

DAY 36 - CHESED OF YESOD

Lovingkindness of Bonding

we count thirty six days, which is five weeks and one day of the Omer. 
 

Love is the heart of bonding. You cannot bond without love. Love establishes a reliable base on which bonding can build. If you have a problem bonding, examine how much you love the one (or the experience) with which you wish to bond. Do I try to bond without first fostering a loving attitude? Is my bonding expressed in a loving manner?

Exercise for the day: 

Demonstrate the bond you have with your child or friend through an act of love.

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